About the Love of Persons in Authority

by Mab

About The Love Of Persons In Authority For The Wives Of Other Men ( being a chapter title from Sir Richard Burton's translation of the Kama Sutra)


That business of the Prince of Wales and the Simpson woman was circulating again. Celia Howard had some clever quote about it all and I made the mistake of airily repeating it, something to the effect of persons in authority having a love for the wives of other men. Well, dash it all, it's not often that I see Jeeves discombobulated, but I did then. The tea tray was quite arrested in midair before he collected himself.

"Is that your own bon mot, sir?" he enquired.

This put me in a bit of a tizz. We all know that no man is a hero to his valet (or gentleman's gentleman, or whatever) but no one likes to be seen as transparent as a pane of glass that's thick as a brick to boot. I measured up my options and heroically aimed for the truth. "Borrowed it from Celia Howard. Thought it had a suitably majestic air. He is going to be the king after all."

"Indeed, sir. But I fear that the expression's source is a trifle indelicate. Of course, most people will be in happy ignorance, but among the cognoscenti, some speculation might arise as to your familiarity with the remark."

It's wonderful how Jeeves can go on, but I do wish that he might be a little more transparent himself. Not a word in my 'bon mot' I couldn't have repeated to a baby, assuming a baby gave two hoots for the goings on of HRH. Jeeves carried on. "Miss Howard is a very advanced young lady, is she not?"

Light dawned across the landscape of the Wooster mind. Jeeves is a jolly discreet chap, but we all know that 'advanced' is just one of those synonymey things that means fast. A bit rum even. Put advanced and indelicate in the same frame of reference and you have something that'll make Aunt Agatha raise her eyebrows over the rock cakes. I'd had a very lucky escape.

"Majesty is best left to kings, eh Jeeves?"

"Indeed, sir."


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